Whole 30 Failure

We were starting our Whole30 on the 1st and we failed before we even started.

We had the opportunity to go to Disney World Saturday for the first time in a long while and, well let’s just say the last thing on my mind was our Whole30.

This nut mix was the only thing in the parks that we came across that was technically compliant, but typically we are trying to avoid Canola Oil. To be fair, we weren’t looking too hard for compliant foods, because we agreed to start over today instead. We were curious though, about what is available to us in the parks if we don’t pack our own snacks or meals.

I think if we had been more prepared (and probably a few days further in) we would have made more of an effort to stay compliant and I’m going to be putting in a lot more research before our friends and family start coming in for vacations in the spring.

Living in Florida there are so many places and things to see and do, so learning how to eat out as well as cooking in our home is vital for success, especially when everyone comes in from out of town, and you live in a tiny house.

So today, we started over. Plus, I have all of the tools I need and could want really to be successful on this 30 day journey. I took some different pictures for my before, and realized just how much I need to do this to feel better in so many different ways.

I want to instill more confidence in myself. I want to get to where I can feel comfortable on the other side of a camera. I hate being in front of the lens. I want to have more confidence in my strength and abilities. I want to be more positive towards myself and what I can accomplish and I want to share that positivity with others.

So I’m going to challenge myself during this 30 days to:

  • Not to miss a meal, even if it’s a simple, quick one.
  • Keep my body hydrated
  • Move more everyday even if it’s just 5 more steps
  • Learn more about “not from my kitchen” food options that are not just “go-to” less healthy things
  • Step out of my comfort zone

Day 1 of Whole 30 & Where I’m Starting

Oh the Insecurities:

If you want to know what I look like: I’m fair skinned with faint freckles, and big hazel eyes. Small nose, average lips nothing special just me. Naturally, I’m a dirty blonde/golden blonde depending on the amount of sun it’s been exposed to. Longer hair and growing. 5’2″. Thick girl. So very thick. Soft skin. Small frame, with curves a plenty, and cushioning bountiful. I’m not an unattractive girl but I struggle with insecurities and I have all my life.

Now, at not quite 25, I am the heaviest, and unhealthiest I have ever been and I am so very unhappy with my appearance and self-worth is below average, and for me below-average is dangerous, because I struggle with self-worth, and confidence, and esteem anyhow. So today starts a new journey. February 1, 2018, is the first day of my first go-round with Whole30.

I’m so blessed that I am not alone in this, one of my very close friends has been on this journey for several months, and human mate is starting this journey with me now. As soon as my sister is self-sufficient enough to be stable and consistent in cooking she will also be joining us on this Whole30 adventure. Then, there are countless communities to turn to that can be another tribe of sorts to get support in this endeavor.

So here’s my ultimate insecurity post, and starting line. I’m walking the plank in my head sharing my measurements and before pictures with the absolute certainty, that this is the last day that I will be stuck in this body without taking another step forward no matter how small some days that step may be.

My Measurements: 

  • Birthday: March 27th
  • Current Age: 24
  • Height: 5’2″
  • Weight:
  • Bust: 47”
  • Chest: 42 1/4”
  • Waist: 47”
  • Belly (Midway):60”
  • Hips:51”
  • Thigh: 28”
  • Knee: 19”
  • Calves: 17”
  • Upper Arm (Bicep): 12 1/2”
  • Lower Arm: 10 1/4”

And then because I’m curious I also took these measurements:

  • Neck: 16”
  • Wrist: 6 3/4”
  • Ring Finger: 6cm

 

Little Victories Goals for this week: 

Drink 2-3 Liters of Water a Day

Walk 30+ Minutes everyday

Stay on Plan (No Fail, Plan, No Failure Possible)

Meal Prep/Grocery Get on Sunday

Taking a Big Step Forward

Well, this is the beginning of a journey. One that has been a long time coming, but I’ve never worked hard to pursue. This time, I have the motivation and the necessity. While, I have never been at a point in my life where I have been happy with my body or how I look, I until recently had also never been repulsed or disgusted by it. So I have to make some changes. I am going to be 25 years old in March (2018.) So here I am making a menu plan, to go shopping for groceries and start this journey of kicking my own ass and getting to where I want to be. This will not be a lost year for me. This will be a year of growth, and shrinking, and happiness. I’m not going to lie to you, I’m gonna ball my eyes out along the way I’m sure.  My health has become a priority in my life. I’ve let it take a backseat for far too long.

A major step that I’ve decided to take starting February 1st, we are going to start the Whole30 and make some major adjustments to how we are eating at our house, and hopefully by making those changes we’ll notice some changes in how we feel. I have read a lot about the Whole30 and as much as I’m very nervous about this journey, I’m looking forward to growing through the challenge. Breaking bad habits and my body’s and mind’s dependency on certain foods, while difficult, will be so freeing. I have a terrible relationship with food, I eat too much, and I definitely don’t always make the best decisions on what I’m eating. I know that having a plan and some structure will really help me be able to jumpstart this change for me.

There are a few things about doing Whole30 that I really think are awesome and influenced my choice in doing this program over any other meal planning or meal outlines. One of those things is that it’s not about “dieting” it’s about changing your relationship with food and the authors are very specific about that idea. Another great thing about the Whole30 is that, in case you don’t know anything about it, it starts with a 30 day elimination period, and then slowly, and systematically reintroducing the food groups that were eliminated to see how you feel as your body digests and processes that food. For me, that was another big draw because of all of the inflammation and swelling and pain I have from my psoriasis and accompanying arthritis. I’m hoping that this will help with those symptoms. Another great thing about this adventure is that in our home we are going to learn a lot about food, and cooking, and playing with flavor and being flexible with our food. I am going to learn to be less picky, and truly try some new things, and expand my food horizons.

This will be a grand adventure in self-discipline, and believing in myself, to really boost my self-confidence. I have not yet started the Whole30, but I really believe that getting through this 30 days without failing or cheating will be a really great thing for my health physically of course, but also for my wellbeing as a whole. This is going to be a really hard thing for me, I’ve never really taken the steps to be healthy and good to my body like I am doing now, and I don’t for a second think any of this is going to start out easy. Every part of taking these steps though is necessary to get the to healthier, happier, better me that I want to be.

As I learn though I want to be honest with you guys, and I when I stumble I want to be real with you guys. I’m going to introduce you to me a little at a time, mostly because I have a lot going on, and I don’t want to overwhelm myself throwing everything out there. I also am still trying to figure some things out. So, I don’t want to say something that may not be true, and I don’t want to seem misguided. I’m also not going to make any promises. I’m going to commit to myself, and as I commit to myself and growing myself and getting myself to a better being, I may leave you in the dark, so while I may be slightly sorry about that just know that I intend to keep you updated and in the know as much as I can muster.

With that being said, I want to be more confident, and because of that I’m going to be transparent as possible through this process, and share my meal plans, and what my activities are, as well as the measurements and not so easy to share, or not so pretty things that I come across along the way.

Healthier to be Happier Goals

Let’s talk about goals again for a minute. I like to think of myself as a goal-oriented person, “a real goal getter.” Last year, when the new year rolled around, I decided that after the end of 2015, and the beginning of the year I had in 2016 (while the later part of the year was great, and I met the love of my life) I needed to just take life one day at a time and recover from everything else. So, I didn’t set any goals, other than well, survive, and get well. In some ways, I exceeded my expectations for 2017, and I recovered from a lot of what happened the year before.

Where I failed myself though was in my physical health and well-being. 2017 was a struggle for my health more so than any other year in my life. In July, I had a tonsillectomy, adenoidectomy, uvulopalatopharyngoplasty, septoplasty, and they reduced some turbinates in my nose. That was a very hard recovery, and took me out for a solid two weeks. I can breathe now, and I feel better overall, so it was well worth the surgery. I sleep through the night, and I don’t scare the bejeezus out of my Human Mate, with sleep apnea, or gurgles anymore.

I have had psoriasis most of my life, and for the most part it’s just been the itchy, painful dry, flaky, scaly skin that is typical with psoriasis. This last year however, after having some severe back pain and struggle walking longer distances and standing for extended periods of time, was also diagnosed with psoriatic arthritis and have struggled with a lot of pain and swelling in my joints, which is where the pain and problems with my hips and back had been coming from. In October, I was put on Humira injections, and I hate them, I hate having to get a shot every other Wednesday and I just don’t have a healthy relationship with this medication, and I haven’t since day one of the treatment. I still have terrible skin in the active spots, by the Sunday prior to shot day, I’m in pain again and I’ve started getting severe headaches and nausea in the afternoons and evenings. Don’t get me wrong this is an amazing drug, and I think it really does make a difference in people’s lives, at this point in time though, I’m just not thrilled with it.

In the last year and a half, or so, I’ve also been very happy, and with that, and not having reliable access to a kitchen, I gained a whole lot of weight from eating really poorly, and really not moving a lot. So this year, 2018, of course I need to focus, and create a plan, and really work on my physical well-being.

With that being said, I have 10 goals for the new year. In case you missed my first post of all of my goals you can see that here.  Three of my goals are particularly pointed at getting my butt in gear and getting healthy and taking care of myself.

  1. Pamper
    • I have not taken a lot of time in the past couple of years to pamper myself, and wear makeup or take the extra time to care for my skin a little more, so this year, I set out to find some good products, that make me feel good about using them for me, and don’t make me feel bad for using them. I looked into cruelty-free products and companies and I settled on a few products to pamper myself this year. (You can see what I decided on here.) pexels-photo-275765.jpeg
  2. Get control of my Health
    • There are so many components to this, from Spiritual health, to physical health, and everything in between.
    • Like I said earlier in this post I am on Humira, once every other Wednesday my Human Mate is a champ and sticks me with a needle and counts to ten while I have a melt down because that’s just what I do, thankfully we have figured out that icing the area to inject for the 30 minutes we let the pen sit out before injecting makes a world of difference and recently we changed to my abdomen rather than my thigh, and I don’t even feel the shot until after it’s over, and there is just a slight burn. IMG_4771.jpg
    • Honestly, I don’t cry because of the pain anymore it’s just the emotional reaction of where I am and what that injection means for me right now is not a healthy emotional place. That being said, one of my reasons or smaller goals for this “Get Control of My Health” is that I want to be off of medications or at least to the point of medications be less/more successful. I believe a large part of that will be getting to a healthy weight and healthy lifestyle with a better relationship with food, and my body as a whole.
      • As of January, we have changed my treatments to an infusion of REMICADE® (infliximab).
      • When I know more about this and what it means for my health and how I feel I will definitely share what I can.
    • Another huge driver of getting healthy is that in the next two years, we want to grow our family possibly, and right now that’s not an option even if we wanted to, so operation start a family starts with operation get my ass healthy.
  3. Drink More Water
    • Obviously, Drink More Water is pretty self-explanatory. On one hand if I’m drinking water I’m not drinking soda or Sweet Tea, which while soda isn’t a big deal for me to give up, I’m a Tea and Coffee addict, so that is a STRUGGLE. I’m starting slow with one liter a day for January but after that I really want to be drinking two solid liters of water a day and of course more if necessary.  IMG_2808.jpg

Of Course, on the outside some of these goals seem very simple, and that’s the point I had in making them, a huge focus for me this year, is me, and that first and foremost means getting my health in check and feeling comfortable in my own skin more. I’m readier than ever to start this journey and I’m happy to have this tangible and accountable record for this journey.

My Cruelty Free Beauty Experience

My decision to go cruelty free in my beauty and pampering routine, was solely based on the fact that if I am going to be spending more money for better products anyway, I want to feel good about the company I’m supporting in that they are not harming something to give me a good product.

My main resource in researching was Cruelty Free Kitty. Honestly, I love her website, and she is super helpful having created this one place to reference who is or isn’t cruelty-free, and policies, and other information pertaining to cruelty-free company vs. Those who are not. I learned a lot reading through the information she provided, and I really recommend visiting her website if you’re interested in learning more.

I chose the products that I did, based on my previous experience with some of them, as well as what I wanted, and what I felt comfortable spending and on myself.

The first thing that I did was get rid of all of my makeup that was older than the recommended use for the product. I didn’t realize until a couple of years ago that make up could really even go bad, but I generally follow the recommendation printed on each product.  There is typically a symbol like the one pictured below, an open jar with an amount of time the product should be used by for best results.

IMG_6627.jpg

Then I thought about what products I needed and what I loved to use in the past that made me feel confident and comfortable to wear. I also thought about some of the things that I wanted to address in my personal care routine, like my hair being out of control and frizzy a lot of the time because of the humidity and living in Florida. I also, wanted to get clearer and softer skin back.  So I made a list of the few things that I thought I wanted to get and I made sure to find products that matched what I was looking for while staying cruelty-free and without spending too much.

For My Hair:

Shae Moisture

I started with the conditioning treatments, and as I run out of my other products, I will add more Shae Moisture products to my haircare routine. The rose scent is super strong and gorgeous and I adore rose, so I was so happy with this masque. I did find that while my hair gets super dry and is delicate, the first day after using either mask my hair is very heavy and I don’t like the feel of my hair until after the first wash. After the first wash, it’s light and soft, and stays perfect for about a week and I start again.  A little goes a long way with these for my fine, medium/long length, baby hair. I am able to use the packets pictured below for up to 4 times, completely covering my whole head and combing it through per the instructions.

img_6171.jpg

https://www.crueltyfreekitty.com/list-of-cruelty-free-brands/

Skin Care:

First Aid Beauty

I’ve used First Aid Beauty for quite some time, probably about three years now, and I adore their products, I feel like my skin is refreshed and clean when I use each step regularly.

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https://www.crueltyfreekitty.com/skincare/cruelty-free-skincare-brands/#firstaidbeauty

Pacifica

https://www.crueltyfreekitty.com/skincare/cruelty-free-skincare-brands/#pacifica

Acure Organics

For body lotion I love Acure Body Firming Lotion! I love the smell, even though when I first started using it, over two years ago, it took some getting used to. I can almost always find it at Target and it makes me feel good about putting it on my body even if the tightening factor is maybe just a perception.

img_6385.jpg

https://www.crueltyfreekitty.com/skincare/cruelty-free-skincare-brands/#acureorganics

Make-up:

Bare Minerals

I just love the way Bare Minerals lays on my skin and how I don’t feel like I have a face full of makeup with their products even if I do have a full face of makeup on.

img_6168.jpg

https://www.crueltyfreekitty.com/ultimate-guide-to-cruelty-free-makeup/#bareminerals

Nail Polish:

Pacifica — I found a dense gorgeous holo top coat. (Or Taco if you follow Cristine of SimplyNailogical) “Rainbow Gloss” is my super happy find. It’s so pretty anyway but displays a stunning prismatic color show when the right light or sunshine hits it. I am totally in love with it.

Orly

img_6170.jpg

https://www.crueltyfreekitty.com/nails/cruelty-free-nail-polish/

My Goals for 2018!

There seems to me to be four types of people when it comes to new year’s resolutions. Those who are all about taking a look at their lives and setting some goals to accomplish with the onset of a new year. These people then fall into one of two categories, those who set them with good intentions and slowly forget, or lose their intention to accomplish the resolutions they set for themselves. Then, there are the goal getters who set something and make a plan, and then work on their goals until they reach a determined “finish line.” There are those that just don’t believe in setting new year’s resolutions, or just don’t really care about them at all. And then there are those that seem to have something against setting new goals for the new year. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think that the whole “new year, new me” memes are entirely inaccurate. I think that just saying “Oh this year, I’m going to become a new person,” with no real benchmarks or plan, is truly a set up for failure. I am a fanatical planner, obsessive even, and planning really is calming and productive if I follow along with it. I enjoy having things thought out in advance and knowing what needs to happen and what we intend to do ahead of time.

Naturally, I enjoy having goals, and making plans to achieve those goals. Last year, I didn’t set any goals and just decided to take life one day at a time. In some ways, I exceeded my expectations for 2017, and I recovered from a lot. Now though, while everything is still about taking it one step at a time, I feel like it’s time to work on some things and set some goals. I wanted to keep my goals fairly simple in their ideas, and so some are vague, while others are very specific. The nice thing about having some vague goals is that there are smaller goals that fall under their umbrella but are day to day goals and benchmark goals so they can help gauge where I am and how well I’m accomplishing what I set out to do.

So, what are my goals? I started with ten, and the thing about these ten (like I’ve said, they are simple, and some are vague) is that accomplishing them is all a matter of me setting out to do what it takes to accomplish them, and as long as I work towards them, there should be no reason I can’t accomplish each one in my own way. Even if there is a goal that isn’t fully accomplished at the end of the year to what I originally wanted I’m keeping my attitude and outlook on my goals as simple and taking the steps one at a time to get to where I want to be.  Let’s take a look:

  1. Pamper.
  2. Get Control of My Health.
  3. Get Married to my Human Mate.
  4. Pursue a Job that I Love. (WHY I’m Here.)
  5. Run After What I Want.
  6. Practice Grace.
  7. Pray More.
  8. Drink More Water.
  9. Waste Less.
  10. Make a piece of clothing.

I want to dive into these a little further for some of them, and I want to share with you my progress and failures, and accomplishments as I work my way through these goals and chase after my dreams this year with a vengeance.

Do you make resolutions or goals with the new year? If you do, what are your goals for 2018? How can I encourage you to be the best you and accomplish your goals for this year?

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Okay y’all, so I’m taking this a little more seriously this go around, I’ve set up the social media accounts and I’m developing as much as I can to get involved in this world of blogging and connecting with you! So check out my Facebook page, or Instagram where I’ll be doing some photography challenges coming up. I’m so excited for some of these projects that I’m currently working on.

 

 

It’s Here! The New Year! 2018

2017…was a very interesting year. I got to spend the whole year, with my best friend, and we’re more solidly together than ever before. We’ve grown as people and a couple and have overcome some hurdles together. Overall 2017 wasn’t a horrible year, it had its moments, it was hard, but it’s been a good year.  

It’s been a big year of patience, and taking a step back and just letting a lot of things go, and so much new growth. It’s been a year of coming out of the Dark, and it’s been enlightening (pun intended.)  

Health was an overwhelming hurdle this year, with a major/minor surgery, a couple hospital visits, a few x-rays and scans, countless doctor appointments, and too many needles to count.  

I did get to travel and spend some good time with family, as well as see a large part of the country from the seat of an airplane. Melany moved here, and we got to spend more time together.  

For the most part we stayed close to home, and kept it low key. We learned very quickly that we didn’t want to be apart. After a lot of driving back and forth for David, and some really awful roommates. We moved to a cozy, adorable #littlecabinnotsointhewoods. And it’s everything I’ve ever wanted, except enough storage space, it could work on its storage spaces. I still get butterflies, and giggles when we’re together, and this is the best life with David. I’m so happy that we get to grow together and pray together and study, and pursue God together.  

And now we’ve arrived at 2018! My words for 2018 are Celebrate and Create! There are so many things happening this year, and some amazing things coming that only happen once in a lifetime! I can’t wait for what 2018 has in store, I’m sure it’s packed full of blessings and changes and it’s all going to be wonderful. And what’s not wonderful will be okay, because it’s all a part of the big plan that God has for my life. I am still going to take this year 1 day at a time. I wish you all a Happy New Year and the best health and happiness! 

My Current Philosophy

Chin up, there is a silver lining and it will get to you sooner or later.

Focus on the present and choose your happy.

Basically my life is in 4 sections right now. Which is probably over simplifying things, but hey, that’s the best way to start breaking it down. God, Family, Health, and Living; four, all encompassing, quadrants that my life falls into. Or I guess you could call them my main focuses.

God being obvious, studying the word, pushing my prayer life and boundaries, chasing God’s will for my life and being obedient.

Family being that it’s growing, and changing, and challenging. I’m trying to learn how to communicate and balance everyone with everything else. My immediate, and extended family is scattered across the globe, and majority of my close friends and family are more than half of the breadth of the country away, so seeing them and staying in touch is a learning process and it’s hard sometimes to figure where the time will come from to keep up with everyone.  The flip side of that is that I’m at the time in my life where I’m also starting my own family, I’ve met my mate, and we have plans for our future. In the coming years, God willing and us able,  I’m sure that our little family will continue to grow.

Health is probably my biggest lack of discipline. Getting into a healthy lifestyle and making healthy decisions on all fronts, physically, mentally, emotionally, is a big deal right now. In the last few months I’ve run into a few challenges with each area of health, and addressing the needs and habits that need adjustment is a large focus of my life. The thing about healthy living is it’s all about control, moderation, and at the core of each of those: Discipline. The one skill, I am the absolute worst at possessing and acting with is discipline. So I’m working on that skill, and pushing through the muck to better myself.

Living is everything else. From making a living, and home, and family. To actually living, making friends, participating, exploring, and enjoying life. Living to be alive, rather than living to work and working live. Replacing that old and unfulfilling way of life with a passion and balance to survive the ups and downs of everything else.

Welcome

This is my very first post. Welcome to my website. This is a place where I will be sharing parts of my life. Like most people, I am facing some challenges and I needed an outlet to get some thoughts and feelings out into the cosmos, and this seemed like a good way to get what I need to get out of me and into a written record.

I will post about my life, the fun, and some of the harder moments. I’ll bring you into my kitchen for some fun as I love to be in the kitchen and making things. There will be art, and design elements all over the place, because that’s my passion place, the arts. I will share my favorite things with you. And you may get a rant or two occasionally. This is my life, and I hope you get some joy, and humor from it.

I will use this platform, and place to keep myself accountable to my goals, being present and choosing happy. That’s where the name “Humphy Happy Girl” came from in part after all. So I welcome you if you’ve made it here, I look forward to sharing with you.

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